Have you ever had one of those weeks where everything just blurs together? Maybe you've had a month or even a year like this. So much happens at once and most of it you never intended to do. It's like stuff comes at you on all sides. In this time, it's hard to have clarity. Focusing on one thing may prove near impossible. Sometimes you may even ask yourself, "Am I doing something wrong? Should I not be so racy in each moment?" Usually, there are so many things on your mind that you need to do, that you don't get to the things you really want to do and maybe even some things that really need to be done. In these times where "stuff" comes at you from all sides, have you ever wanted to be lifted out so you could see clearly from the outside? Or maybe you just want a few days of just rest and nothing in order to reset?
That's the current state I'm in if you couldn't tell already :) With being at the cross roads in so many areas and each event and circumstance just piling on. I went through a two year Bible program in just five months while living in the most diverse square mile in America. In this time, I was filled with a wealth of information about the life of a refugee and the present state of our world. There are some extremely tough stories from every one of these incoming families. They have been ravaged by war, religious persecution, and even genocide. On top of that, they come to America expecting to have many friends, be taken care of, learn English, and get a good job. In reality, most of them don't make any American friends. We have friends who were here 14 months and we were their first friends. This is not atypical, this is the norm. Most of them come with a gift from their land for their friend and 90% never give that gift because they don't make a single American friend that will invite them into their house. It's a pleasure and honor to serve in this area but it's sad to see the unmet needs. I can say with integrity we've made a huge impact in this community and hundreds have seen the light of Christ in us.
Other than that, I've continued to venture on my 6 year trek to medical school. After 2 years of seeing and feeling that it wasn't the right time, God gave me all sorts of confirmation that I should apply for 2011. Let me tell you what, applying for medical school is like a full time job. Always something left to do. I wish there were a way to track all of the hours from studying for the MCAT to researching schools and applying but on the other hand, I'm sort of glad I can't see that big faaat number. Now I'm on the home stretch, with an empty wallet, with only a few more secondary applications to finish up (of course each school asks for a different essay and info). Then on to the next phase of interviews if they like me :)
Immediately after returning to Clarkston from Christmas break, I moved apartments. Yes, it was only next door but it did eat up some time and provide some discomfort. Also, 4 students arrived which are looking to us for guidance, tips, and what they're supposed to do (3 of them sharing my apartment). Other than that, organizing a big (168 hr) prayer event for the community lasting a full week, to bring many believers together. That took some time and effort too.
Insert India...In just 9 days, I'll be traveling all across northern India with three others to meet with different NGO's, ministries, and pastors to see what part we could play in serving there. With over a billion people, many never having heard of Jesus (2,233 people groups out of 2,533 in India to be exact). That's sad to see so many without Christ even after 2,000 years since He came and died. I'm excited just to go and learn, experience the culture, and encourage those who are serving there. We will also spend a good 3 or 4 days in Thailand to visit friends and see Bangkok.
Despite all the madness and having no idea where I'll be 6 months from now, I am encouraged in the Lord. I am grateful to be surrounded by some great like-minded friends and always have tremendous support from my family. The great thing is that no matter how much the scenery, people, climate, work, and seasons change, God is always there. Matt 28:20 boldly says "And behold, I am with you always, even unto the very end of the age." Other verses of comfort to me are: Psalm 18:2 " The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold." Psalm 55:22 "Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; He will never let the righteous fall." Psalm 73:26 "My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."
Despite all that goes on, though I may grow weary, it's all about my perspective; since His yoke is easy and His burden is light. Even in the toughest of obstacles and trials, if we fix our eyes in the right place, on Him, everything that caused the blurrrr becomes the blurrrr and Jesus comes into focus
I sort of always envisioned "living in the Spirit" as this sort of lifestyle that had it all together. It's the life where you get up early like Jesus, spend time in the middle of nowhere to pray, and then walk out with nothing and go where God takes you. No cell phone ringing. No laptop in hand. No TV around. No radio or ipod in your ears. Do you think that life is still possible in today's world? How can one live with direction, clarity, and in the Spirit? Do you think that by doing so much that we do too little? It's a hard balance and surely the balance must be found by living in the Spirit, but do we even have an idea of what that translates into today or is it a forgotten way of life?
ReplyDelete